Internal strife...........

I think most people know the Native American story of the two wolves. A very wise story. It is true, we have two sides to ourselves some times more than two. I am very conscious of this in my own life. I struggle daily to get the good wolf to be upermost in my life. Most of the time I think he is, but I can hear the other one grumbling not too far below the surface.
I spend quite some time on Facebook. I love it for keeping in touch with my cousins in England and in Australia and friends throughout the world. I have joined a few groups and some are about animals and fightin against cruelty, finding homes for abandoned dogs and cats. I like to think that spreading the word helps. I have had to stop though, I can no longer take seeing how evil some people are. The cruel things they do to helpless animals the way they throw away and old dog simply because he is old or sick. Or worse leaving him chained in an abandoned basement or yard to starve to death.

I wont mention some of the hideous things I have seen as I don't want you to have that image in your mind. My wolf who is buried deep inside comes to the surface and is so angry he could kill and maim.....he is so full of hate and loathing for those people who commit those crimes. I have a job to get him back down in his cave and chain him again..............he has to be chained so as to keep him there. He is not a normal wolf, not a wolf at all (animals do not behave that way) I use that image unfairly because of the Indian story. My wolf is a demon.................

I try not to use the word hate. I know I must love even the most unlovable. It is not for me to judge others and all that. I do try, try so hard but when I see the evil in the world I can not help myself. I feel the chains getting weaker............so I have stopped getting some of those posts even though people need to be aware. People need to stop buying fur for one thing. Find out, educate yourself as to where that fur comes from. Its not that animals are killed for their fur so much as the conditions they live in and the methods of killing. Such cruelty. I hear the chains begin to rattle.............puppy mills..........don't buy from pet shops. Again, educate yourself. When buying from a breeder, see the parents of the puppy.ask for references. Do the right thing.

Don't buy animals as gifts unless you know they are welcome into a forever home.It's not just about animals. War is evil...........hunger is evil..........homelessness is evil.....making people beg for food and be denied health care because they can not afford it. Who are we to judge who is deserving of help? It's all evil and my wolf is tugging at his chains now.......Selfishness, making self the center of all. Face it, we cant take anything with us when we leave this world, we brought nothing in. Why are we so obsessed with things.? No other animal does what man does. No other animal collects so much stuff that they cant move it or leave it. We will fight to he death over what is "ours" .........well I have news folks, if you can not let go of a possession then it possesses you and not the other way around.
My wolf is angry now and feels the chance of coming up to the light.

Jesus tells us to love one another. To give to the poor, to comfort the lonely and surely He would want us to do what we can to stop abuse of animals and children. He has us in a certain place in the world and we must bloom where we are planted. I can not stop what happens in another country, not in any meaningful way not with my lack of resources. I can speak up though. I don't need to see it to know evil exists. I must calm my wolf. Pet him and settle him down again. I will not allow hatred to get a grip in my heart. We can not say "why does God not do something about it" HE DID, he put us/me here on earth and we must share the blame if we cover our eyes. We must not be a part of the problem. I have things to resolve in my own life, I can not inspect another's life or motives. For now my wolf is calm. I know he is there but he will never be free as long as I believe that God has a plan, that God will some day see to it that justice is served. I feel sorry for my evil wolf.............maybe he didn't mean to be bad, but he is and I can not afford to be soft with him. I can not ever let him loose.