Three Years............

Will the time ever come when I no longer keep track of the number of years? Alexandra, I still can not believe you are gone from us. Jason wrote today on Facebook, he still mourns you. As he said you left a hole in the hearts of your sisters, They won't recover, they are damaged now. Both in different ways but there is a change in them.

The loss is this..........she was difficult, she was immature at 21 and  had so many problems. She was  wrapped up in her self so much. The psychiatrist said she had a personality defect that she could not empathize and was narcissistic. We all knew this but we loved her anyway. What we are missing is seeing her grow and become a woman and we had hoped that she would settle down and become mature. That marriage would be good for her and for Tristen. I am not sure that would have happened. We will never know. Bill is engaged now. The ring he gave her is still on her finger. I helped him to put it there, They had broken up and just got back together. He had not given her back the ring yet. I held her hand as he put the ring back on. She would have liked that.

I am happy that Bill has moved on, I know how difficult it was for him in the beginning. He has found a lovely lady. She came with him for Tristen's birthday. It's sad but I am pretty sure that Bill will come less often now. It's only natural and really he has no reason to stay in touch with Tristen, even though he wanted to at first. That is life, that's what happens and it is OK. I don't know when they will get married but its another thing that we will never see. Alex as a bride. I do have a picture of her trying on a wedding dress, she was so thrilled about that. That is what she looked forwards to, being the beautiful bride and she would have been.
This is Bill and Tristen

Being a beautiful bride, that reminded me of a day we went shopping. Danielle and Gabby and Alex, I took them shopping. Among other things I bought Alex a dress and I also bought a pair of heels to go with it. Well she was wearing the dress because we told her how "hot" she looked in it. It was very short and orange frothy material. She looked very very hot, she has very long legs. So meanwhile I followed her over to where she was admiring herself in the mirror and just in time to see her pucker up and kiss herself in the mirror. She had the decency to blush but that was just Soooooooooo Alex. She strutted her stuff through the mall. Danielle kept the dress for the memories. All three of the girls are beautiful, but Alex just had that personality that could not be ignored.
She demanded attention, she was the typical drama queen. It was all about her.
She was also insecure. She would have been amazed at the number of people who came to the viewing. The number of people who loved her. The number of people who still miss her.