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Take a walk in Blue Bell Woods listen to the sounds around you, of bird song and bees. Smell the flowers and the scent of Spring in the air. Every year is a new beginning and every day a blessing

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Saturday, April 20, 2013

Family..............

When explaining to a fellow blogger about Alexandra (previous post) I realized what a complicated family I have.
I was an only child growing up. My Uncle Alan got divorced and came to live with us for a time. He was the first I ever knew who was divorced. It was a rare thing back then. I only ever knew two other couples who were divorced as I grew up. It was not an easy thing to do.
Well these days, if people bother to marry in the first place it's not always forever. Times they are a changing. Without seeming judgmental I want to say that I have now lived long enough to see why God does not recommend it. Those I know now who have traveled that road have not always done better for themselves or their children. Having said that...........there are and always will be exceptions.
SO......my family.
I had my daughter Laura out of wedlock. A big thing in 1966. My Mother in fact more or less kicked me out. I went to a Mother and Baby home in London and kept my baby. Later I was asked by my Dad to go home and I did.
LauraJane, she married at 18 years old. She married Dan who was in the Marine corps and they eventually had three daughters. Danielle, Alexandra and Gabrielle. They divorced after a time, Marine Corps life not being an easy one when the husband is in a deploying unit. She remarried briefly and again divorced. She is now married to Robert. He came to the marriage with two children, one from a previous marriage Evie and Raylene from another relationship. They also have a child together my fourth granddaughter Reina.
There is no Partridge family in real life.

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(Lauras family. Husband Robert bottom with Raylene. The birthday party for Reina has Danielle, Gabrielle Alexandra and Evie in it. Alex with Laura and Reina and Me and Laura in that set)

This picture is of my 4 granddaughters. Reina, Alexandra,Gabrielle and Danielle

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My son Jason is still single and has no plans as yet to change that. I think his generation are not so quick to jump in as we were.

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My other son Justin married Carrie, she has two daughters from two previous marriages. Justin and Carrie will not be able to have children together due to Carrie's health.
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(Justin's family, wife Carrie and daughter Teal and the older one is Haley)

So that's the basic information on my 3 kids. The rest of the story involves my granddaughters.
When Dan (who raised the 3 girls when he and Laura divorced) left the Marine Corps at the end of his career with them. He came back to Michigan and stayed with my husband and myself while he went to college to become a nurse. We had the room and they were my girls too, so..........it was not popular with Laura at first but in time she came to see the advantages. In the long run it was the best for everyone and I believe everyone now understands that. Dan eventually remarried. He married Debbie who had three kids herself. Cameron, Emily and Lauren.
 photo 5274a2a0-0d64-42f7-ab65-8ea24bfa7e08_zps36735fc1.jpg (Dan and Debbie)

That made a blended family of 6 children. That did not always go smoothly, in fact it didn't go well at all for a time. I believe everyone did their best to make it work.
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The above picture shows Dan with Lauren and Cameron who are Debbie's children, Todd Herman is on the end and in front is Debbie, Laura Herman and her daughter Hannah and Debbie's daughter Emily.
Each girl as they became a school leaver ready for college moved in with me, my granddaughters that is. First came Danielle who went to the local college for a time, it was good for her to begin to become independent, she seemed to like being away from home but still safe. She eventually went on to the Upper Peninsula to college. She has since married and is a nurse now.
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Alexandra was next, she moved in while Danielle was still here. Her dad asked me to help with her and to have her live here for awhile. She was never the easy one. She lived with me on and off until her death. She is the Mother of Tristen who has always lived with us.
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Gabrielle came to live with us and when it was time for college she went down state to Ferris. She came back when Alex died and stayed. She stayed until her baby was due. She is now living with her boyfriend Tony who she has known for several years now, and baby Cooper. She does not want to marry just yet.

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So the next generation consists of Tristen and Cooper my two great grandsons..............pictured below
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So now my husband and myself are raising Tristen with Alexandra gone. Dan (Laura's ex) is once more living with us while he sorts his life out again, he and Debbie are getting a divorce it seems. I am hoping they will have some time for reflection and maybe work things out, if not he will be able to stay until he decides what to do. Meanwhile Tristen is enjoying having Grandpa here with us.
Tonight everyone is over at Laura Hermans house, she is Dan's neice and my Laura's bestfriend. She has Tristen for the weekend, he goes every other weekend. Jason came home to spend time with Gabby and take her out for the day. He has always tried to take an interest in Laura's girls and was very close with Alexandra. So Jason and Gabby, Tony and Cooper are going over for a game night. Dan's going over too and so is Laura and Robert and Reina. SO like I said........we are complicated. I love it that we can all get along and be there for Tristen and each other.

6 comments:

NanaDiana said...

God bless you as you raise that beautiful boy. Your life has certainly not been an easy one. Family relations are hard enough any day of the week and you have certainly had your share of heartaches but smiles, too. Blessings- xo Diana

Merlesworld said...

Such a large family you make my head spin my family is very small and we have problems yours are added to by sheer numbers but also the joys and happiness, you are doing a good job, I wish you the best nothing beats family.
Merle.........

laurajane said...

Tristan is a poppet,and you are doing a great job.He is surrounded by love from the whole family.
Problems come and go and as you say people don't have to stay unhappy anymore,they can move on.If they can all stay friends it's a bonus.
Keep enjoying your lovely family.x

Danni Baird @ Silo Hill Farm said...

Wow! You really do have a blended family! Seems like you are teaching them all what family is really about!

Magic Love Crow said...

This is what family is all about! Being there for each other! It doesn't matter how big or small, or how complicated ;o)

Wsprsweetly Of Cottages said...

I had heard your story and to see the photo's was so much fun! :)
Hugs,
Mona